Monday, September 24, 2007

This is becoming a pattern with you, girl

Well, as anyone who has watched my life over the last four years knows, I have the ups and the downs in the ordination process. We have hit another wall, my friends. Yesterday I learned that I have been assigned a new clergy contact and my process is on hold. IF it continues, it won't be before January. I no longer have a committee nor the promise of one.

So that was kind of shocking, but then, I could also accept it. I mean, I didn't really believe it could work out so easily. I guess there is more to be done - on me, in my ministry - and that work will now happen. I didn't really get a straight answer about why, nor do I really expect to. I can only believe that in the end God has all this in Her hands, and we're just on this crazy journey together.

There's a longer story but rehashing it won't really do us much good. The fact is that my process has derailed again (for once not by my choice - yay! I'm learning not to sabotage myself!), and now we are back to plan A, the phd thing, and probably will be better for it. Plan B is on indefinite hold as far as I'm concerned. And I'm really OK with that. I am blessed to have a number of wise women as a support system and they are walking with me through this. And I sense that the process, if it happens, is really not to happen here. And that's OK. The phd thing is exciting - wish I could have dealt with it during my break, but c'est la vie.

Anyway, here is my favorite reaction quote from a friend:
"think about it this way, the devil is working overtime to keep you out of the ministry - i would consider that a compliment. : )"

Yes indeed. Up yours, Satan. You keep doing your best work. We know Who wins in the end.

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